Have you ever found yourself unable to progress in life? Are you constantly facing financial difficulties or getting into trouble? Perhaps you feel like you’re not achieving your full potential. Well, what if I told you that you hold the power to change all of your problems by getting rid of one simple thing? That one thing is called “excuses.”
The power to change your life is within your reach – all it takes is a willingness to confront your fears, challenge your beliefs, and take proactive steps toward growth. While you may not have the power to change any facts, it’s about choosing action over excuses, empowerment over victimhood, and progress over stagnation.
Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses. -George Washington Carver
So, are you ready to break free from the chains of excuses and embrace a future of limitless potential? The journey may be challenging, but the rewards of personal growth and success are immeasurable. In this post, I’d like to explore the common types of excuses, their psychology, and, most importantly, how to overcome them to unlock your full potential and success.
What are Excuses?
Excuses can be defined as explanations or justifications used to defend or rationalize actions, behaviors, or decisions. They are often used to avoid taking responsibility, facing challenges, or admitting shortcomings. Excuses can and will HINDER you from reaching your full potential! You may even have an excuse as to why you can’t read this entire article! Let’s take a look at some of the common types of excuses.
Common Types of Excuses
Procrastination:
Putting off important tasks by making excuses such as “I’ll do it later” or “I work better under pressure” is a common habit that can lead to procrastination. During my college years, I became very accustomed to this habit. I relied on it quite heavily but looking back, I realize that it brought about a lot of unnecessary anxiety and stress in my life.
Fear:
Using fear as an excuse to avoid stepping out of your comfort zone and taking risks can hold you back from reaching your full potential. Feeling apprehensive about the unknown is natural, but allowing fear to dictate your actions can limit your growth and prevent you from seizing new opportunities. Instead of letting fear control you, acknowledge it and move forward despite it. Pushing past your comfort zone allows you to open up to new experiences, learning opportunities, and personal development. Embracing discomfort can lead to meaningful growth and a more fulfilling life.
Lack of resources:
Believing that you lack the necessary resources to pursue your goals, such as time, money, or support, can be a significant barrier. This mindset can make it difficult to move forward. However, it’s important to remember that there are often alternative ways to access the resources you need. Seeking support from others can make a huge difference. Challenging this belief and exploring creative solutions is essential to overcome perceived limitations. My philosophy is “There’s ALWAYS a way!”
Lack of time:
“Time is a created thing. To say I don’t have time is like saying I don’t want to.” -Lao Tzu
I genuinely believe that you make time for what’s important to you, even though blaming a lack of time for not prioritizing what truly matters is a popular excuse. For instance, if you were to win the lottery today, I’d bet everything that you’d make the time to go and pick up that check at a moment’s notice, no matter the circumstances.
Responsibility avoidance:
Blaming others or external circumstances instead of taking responsibility for your choices is common. You might like to attribute your actions to external factors that you believe are beyond your control. For instance, you might say we can’t go out because it’s raining. While the rain is an external factor, the decision not to go out is yours. A little rain has never stopped anyone. In fact, the people of Bergen, Norway, experience rain 239 out of 365 days a year, and they have a saying: “There is no bad weather, only bad clothes.” If they let the rain become a negative factor in everything they did, they would never go outside.
The Psychology of Excuses
The psychology behind excuses is multifaceted and can vary depending on the individual and the specific situation. It can be influenced by factors such as personality traits, past experiences, and social influences. One key aspect is the concept of cognitive dissonance, which refers to the discomfort one might feel when their beliefs or behaviors are inconsistent with each other. When individuals make excuses, they are often trying to justify or rationalize their actions to reduce this cognitive dissonance or discomfort.
Excuses can stem from a fear of failure or a lack of confidence in one’s abilities. People often make excuses to shield themselves from failure, discomfort, or criticism, many of which are unconsciously made.
Another psychological factor behind excuses is the need to protect one’s self-image or self-esteem. By coming up with excuses, one can avoid taking responsibility for their actions and minimize any feelings of guilt or shame. Excuses can also be a way to avoid potential punishment or negative consequences.
Simply recognizing and understanding these excuses can help individuals work towards overcoming them and achieving personal growth and success. It all starts with being honest with oneself. Let’s explore a few ways to help overcome this.
Four Ways to Overcome Excuses (with real-life examples)
1. Self-awareness and reflection:
Like anything else, the first step is usually identifying the problem. It’s important to acknowledge when you are making excuses and understand the underlying reasons. You can achieve this by journaling, and over time, you will start to notice a pattern. This level of introspection will enable you to take ownership of your actions and empower you to make meaningful and positive changes in your life.
2. Change your mindset to a growth mindset:
Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth and learning. I always encouraged my team by emphasizing that “Attitude + Effort = Success!” With the right attitude, you can achieve just about anything. It’s important to lead by example and show our kids they can do anything.
For instance, during my time in the military, I had a troop who struggled with his job performance. Despite this, he maintained an exceptional attitude and consistently put in the effort. As a result, he gained the respect of everyone around him, to the extent that everyone was more than willing to support him in his endeavors. And he succeeded! His achievement was not solely due to his skills but primarily attributed to his unwavering dedication and positive attitude. This serves as a reminder that you can accomplish anything with hard work and the right mindset.
3. Set clear goals and priorities:
Establishing clear and specific goals is vital for achieving success in any endeavor. Take the time to identify what truly matters to you and align your actions with your core values. Doing so can ensure that your efforts are focused on what’s most important to you, leading to a more fulfilling and purpose-driven life.
For example, I used to struggle with managing my finances. I had to give up my monthly pedicures and annual vacations to save for my children’s education and future. It was a tough decision, but I don’t regret it at all. I’ve found new ways to practice self-care that don’t rely on expensive indulgences.
4. Seek support and accountability:
Surround yourself with individuals who inspire and challenge you to take responsibility for your actions. They can provide valuable support in keeping you motivated and progressing toward your goals. It’s essential to heed the advice of your friends and family, even if it may be difficult to hear. Their intentions are often to help you improve, not cause harm. It’s common for us to resist facing the truth, and this resistance is what leads to making excuses.
One of my best friends has five children and has recently faced tough times. I admire her resilience and determination. Despite living paycheck to paycheck and dealing with some debt, she has inspired me by taking on the 100-day envelope savings challenge and sticking with it. She didn’t let her financial struggles hold her back. Instead, she took action to change her situation. Throughout the challenge, she involved her teenage son, who supported and encouraged her and even helped by hiding the money so she wouldn’t be tempted to spend it. I’m amazed by her dedication and resourcefulness. In 100 days, she managed to save about $3,000. Her story proves that it’s possible to overcome financial challenges with determination and the right approach.
Common Examples and What to Do Instead
1. Procrastination: “I’ll do it later. I work better under pressure.”Solution: Instead of saying “I’ll do it later, I work better under pressure,” try starting earlier or breaking the work into smaller, manageable tasks.
2. Late arrival: “Traffic was awful today.” Solution: Make it a point to always leave early and allow for potential delays, aiming to arrive at least 15 minutes before the scheduled time.
3. Missed deadlines: “I had unexpected family obligations.” Solution: Anticipate potential delays by starting tasks early instead of procrastinating.
4. Avoiding exercise: “I’m too tired to work out today.” Solution: Find someone or something to hold you accountable.
5. Unhealthy eating: “I deserve a treat after a long day.” Solution: Seek support or someone who can help hold you accountable. Understand that if you keep telling yourself this, you might compromise your long-term health and well-being for short-term satisfaction.
6. Avoiding social events: “I’m not feeling well.” Solution: It’s important to be honest with yourself and delve into self-awareness and reflection. Take the time to understand the real reason behind not attending social events. Is it due to depression, anxiety, tiredness, or something else? By asking yourself “why” several times, you can dig deeper to uncover the root of the problem. Journaling or seeking out therapy support can be beneficial here.
7. Not completing tasks: “I didn’t have enough time to finish.” Solution: Be honest with yourself and get to the root of “why” you don’t have enough time. Maybe you can rearrange your schedule to make time. Perhaps you have the time but are not using it wisely and efficiently.
8. Overspending: “I needed to treat myself.” Solution: Treating yourself can be beneficial, but it’s important to consider if it’s a necessity. While self-care is important, essentials like food, water, and shelter should always come first. If you need to indulge in self-care, there are other ways to do so without overspending.
9. Avoiding difficult conversations: “I’ll talk to them later when I’m in a better mood.” Solution: According to Brené Brown, growth often requires us to step out of our comfort zone. Avoiding these conversations isn’t beneficial for anyone involved. The best approach is to address these difficult conversations as they arise, rather than putting them off.”
10. Not following through on commitments: “Something came up last minute.” Solution: This indicates that the commitment was not a priority for you and can be seen as a lack of respect. To earn respect, it’s important to demonstrate reliability and follow through on commitments.
11. “Not pursuing goals: “It’s not the right time to start.” Solution: There is never a perfect time to start pursuing your goals, whether starting a family, buying a house, going back to school, or anything else. The right time is now – set your goal and stick to it.”
12. Forgetting important tasks: “I completely spaced out and forgot about it.” Solution: Forgetting important tasks can be frustrating, but it’s important to remember that not everything is equally important. If you find yourself forgetting tasks, it may be helpful to prioritize and set clear goals. Consider the impact of not completing a task, especially if it affects others. This can help you stay on track and ensure that important things get done.
13. Not seeking help or support: “I can handle it on my own.” Solution: Recognizing that it’s okay to ask for help when needed is a crucial step. Embracing this mindset will empower you to succeed by completing more tasks and achieving your goals.
14. Not sticking to a budget: “Inflation is bad right now.” Solution: While it’s true that inflation can impact our finances, it’s important to remember that we can still take control of our budget. During challenging economic times, it’s essential to reevaluate our priorities and necessities. For instance, if you’re struggling to afford your child’s tutoring, but consistently spending on non-essential items like frequent hair and nail treatments, consider reallocating that money to more important areas of your life.
In conclusion, remember that change does not happen overnight. It requires patience, self-reflection, and a commitment to personal development. Each step you take towards shedding your excuses brings you closer to the life you envision for yourself—a life filled with purpose, fulfillment, and endless possibilities.
Excuses don’t change facts. They merely provide temporary relief, which ultimately limits your potential and hinders your growth. You can break free from their grip and unleash your true capabilities by acknowledging your excuses, understanding their impact, and taking proactive steps to overcome them. Start by committing to holding yourself accountable, setting meaningful goals, and taking action towards a life free from excuses. Believe in yourself, take that first step, and watch your excuses fade away, leaving behind a path paved with newfound strength and resilience. Start today, and dare to live a life free from excuses.
I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments on this article. Please leave a comment below.
